I was a young boy and had forced ECT in 1975 in lake alice mental hospital NZ for trying to run away and again 2001 in Auckland hospital due to being overwhelmed buy the effects of keeping all the memories of my childhood suppressed, I tried to take my life. I was not warned of all the risks or side effects, I did not ask for or want The electroshock therapy, according to my friend in 2001 it lifted me from a depression into a brief silliness (the euphoric high that typically follows ECT), quickly followed by an even worse depression than before. And it left me with severe memory loss, and I believe some more cognitive damage, which made it even harder to cope with work and family life .
"I'm interested in the people who say: "But you're so articulate now, how could electroshock therapy have possibly been destructive?" My answer: You do not know me. You do not know what I was like before I had the electric shock treatment, and you do not know what I am like now. Do not pretend that you know what I feel, what I think or who I am. Just because I was able to write a book does not give you a picture of me, other than the picture I 'choose' to present in public. Most people who know me, other than those EXTREMELY close to me never even knew I was depressed. I have a public face, and a private face, and the two are very different. I work very hard at maintaining the public face, and I have worked hard to recover from several very low points in my life. I have never said I was brain dead, simply that there was damage." how much I may never know as Doctors seem unwilling or to scared to run the tests to find out, is this because they already know what the answer is. I just wish they would stop running for cover and do all they can to help me recover so I can have some form of normal life with my family, they deserve to be happy to don’t they.
Malcolm Justice
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